Dear Reese,
This afternoon, I’m on a call with an attorney talking about setting up a trust for you.
When she says, in the list of scenarios to start thinking about, “what if she doesn’t make it; what if the two of you die together?” — I have to swallow a sob so hard and continue talking normally on Zoom, but darling, don’t you dare.
This morning is rough. 5am cries and blowouts and something doesn’t feel good to you at all. Probably your stomach, something seems to be going around the daycare classroom.
This evening is sweet. We listen to music and walk through our routine together, cleaning the kitchen, folding laundry. You move around things in the open refrigerator and sign for more milk before bed.
I push down the existential dread. I melt chocolate and peanut butter and mix it with graham cracker pieces in bed. Someday, we can sugar overload together.
Love,
Mama